and so this is christmas

and what have i done? escaped back to my cave, after a christmas eve day at "the diner" where i began my day with a gift to my coworkers in the kitchen, the unfortunate mexicans far from their families, all 14 of them living in the same casa and so i gave them a candle of Maria, for their casa. They seemed to appreciate the fact i was the only server giving them something they understood. the scratch off lottery tickets thoughfully presented to them by the other servers didn't seem to make much of an impression. then i was off to what i hoped would be a meaningful christmas eve with my daughter and grandaughter, only to watch the child being toted around to family friend's of my daughter's and to her other biological grandparents, "baby's dad" not being present. at least a dozen adults competing for the attention of this delightful 4 year old pointing digital cameras, thrusting ever more "gifts" at her, while I sat and wondered what ever happened to the Christmas Past?
Then back to my daughter's house, where her roomates were involved in a TAPS marathon, so cool are they, so superior to the trash they chose to view on what could be a lovely holy home night. I managed to lay down with my cherished grandaughter and read her the same book my mother read me, the same book i read my daughter every christmas eve, and then we fell asleep........until the dawn of the holy day. when yet more people arrived bearing gifts to this lovely unspoiled child, overloading her with barbies, bratz and spongebob cologne. then she was wisked off for the italian drama that passes for christmas at her other grandparents, plied with food, more uneccesary gifts, while i chose to stay and clean up my daughters ruined kitchen and collect the piles of giftwrap, plastic, staples, twisties, and general ruination that had become the living room. after my daughter arrived back i announced i was not going to any more rounds but would come home to enjoy the holy night, silent night, alone. and she was unable to pick up precious at the appointed time so they could procede to yet another destination, becasue Noni had just began another round of ziti, gifts, most requiring batteries, high heels for dolls, and arguements about whose cannolis would be served alongside the tiramisu bought at Costco. My own gifts, a cd player and a few cds of music that transcends the ages, were left behind on a living room floor amongst the Bratz, Barbies, and batteries not included. Tommorow its back to the diner, which oddly enough, is becoming more normal to me than this absurd orgy which passes for something else i recall, something lovely and appreciated and special. did I do the right thing, by opting out to return to my peaceful cave? indeed.